Blatant Bribery
by shnickers
Summary: Ten detentions later, Hinata was stuffing cake down her throat with her detention-giver. KakaHina for DateMe


_Naruto and associated characters, place, paraphernalia, etc. are all the brainchild of one Kishimoto Masashi. No credit is taken where it is not due._

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He paused in mid-gulp, cake crumbs littered around his mouth and frosting dotting his chin, looking something like a wild-eyed crazy man who hadn't gotten his morning fix. Since things like _"I'm exposed!" _and _"Damn, this cake is good"_ were crowding up the crevices of his brain, he could only manage to choke out, "Urghsh."

She blinked rapidly, mostly confused and partially terrified. "I-I, um, I-I… detention?"

"Oh." He thought some more, taking his time to swallow the mouthful of soggy cake. Since that response didn't seem to be enough, judging by the rapidly growing furrow between her eyebrows, he tried again. "You can't give me detention. I'm the teacher."

She paled instantly, which was hard to believe since she was already so pale to begin with. "I-I-I-I—"

"Kidding." He cut her off easily, before she could leave the realm of antsy and enter the realm of the insane. "I gave you detention?"

"Um… I th-think, five or six times… or was it four and then three…" she babbled, seemingly bewildered by the uncovered and unfortunately _handsome_ face sprinkled with bits of chocolate cake—_damn_ her sweet tooth—and the way he kept blatantly sucking his frosting-covered fingers right in front of her virginal eyes. The rest of her response was swallowed up by a startlingly crimson blush that erupted across her cheeks.

He continued licking frosting from under his nails, undisturbed by her reaction. Swallowing the last bit, he calmly pushed the incriminating cake box behind him and turned fully to his trembling student. "You can go. I excuse the detention."

It took her a good five or six minutes to register, and if she wasn't a top student, he would have definitely thought her a moron. "Okay," she squeaked, before slipping out the door.

He blinked, watching the door slide closed again, before reaching behind and returning the cake to his lap. He eyed it, admiring the handiwork. Huh. Well, if he wasn't a veteran teacher—he wasn't—then this definitely wasn't

_blatant_

_bribery._

Hyuuga Hinata was a good student. She went to class on time, turned in all of her assignments—completed—and studied before exams. She was also soft-spoken, well-mannered, and terribly shy when it came to public speaking. Or speaking to her peers. Or teachers. Or speaking in general, really.

That was why she sat on the cracked leather sofa, patiently and quietly, waiting for her companions to show up, though according to the clock, class had started three minutes ago.

She knew it would take Neji seven or eight more minutes to appear, every strand of perfect hair in its perfect place, inciting in her an equal amount of deep admiration and burning jealousy before effortlessly settling down into the suede leather armchair. And then five minutes later, a very irritated Sasuke would storm through the door and coolly take his place on the hard-backed wooden chair. That didn't really say anything about his personality. Or sexual preferences…

Fifteen minutes after that, her cheery-eyed silver-haired teacher would walk through the door and offer a good four or five excuses—all grumpily vetoed—to her disgruntled classmates before settling into their daily class routine:

Take attendance. Here, Kakashi would shuffle his papers together for a minute or so, before finally pulling out the sheet of paper with exactly two and three-quarters names on it—he claimed his hand had cramped, so "Uchiha Sasuke" was now "Uchiha Sasu"—and would proceed to stare quite intently at the names until Neji gave a subtle, annoyed grunt. Then he would visually sweep the room, taking his time to make sure that, yes, all _three_ students were present. But, as he once explained with what appeared to be a sunny smile stowed under that hideous black mask, he couldn't be sure that just because three students were present did not mean that the _right_ three students were present, so he had to call roll as well. (Sasuke especially loved this part, because thanks to Kakashi's lazy scrawl-and-drawl, the girls had now taken to calling him "Sasu-kun" which was ten times _cuter_, and thus _horrid,_ than "Sasuke-kun.")

The process would take even longer because Kakashi frequently got Neji and Hinata confused, so in order to save time (and hernias, in the case of her two classmates), she had taken to sitting to Neji's right, so that chronologically he was referencing the right name. Neji did turn _quite_ an interesting shade of puce when called "Hinata"—though that wasn't nearly as amusing as when Sasuke had been called "Hinata." Hinata never knew such a pale person could turn that shade of mottled purple. She vaguely wondered whether she should be insulted that so many people did not want to be mistaken as her.

After he had wasted another ten minutes on a three-person attendance call, Kakashi would promptly begin fake-lecturing. Fake-lecturing, as Hinata learned on the first day of class, was where Kakashi would swing his arms around in random bursts of passion, so that from the tiny lookout glass it seemed as though he were pouring knowledge into the three tired students. If one were _inside_ the room, however, Kakashi was really only reading his porn, which was nestled cleverly behind one crossed leg. Or educational literature, as was the lie Hinata was fed (and bought).

_He must really be a great teacher, to enjoy learning new things through reading to the point of smiling, laughing happily, and throwing his arms in celebration, _Hinata naively thought.

Or maybe he was really having sharp and painful spasms that caused him to throw his arms around in the air? Hinata gasped softly, wondering if maybe she had disregarded his symptoms too easily. But then again, she had seen Tsunade peer in once or twice whilst he was in the middle of his gyrations, and since the medi-nin and principal didn't seem too concerned with his odd movements, Hinata supposed it was probably fine. Hm, in fact it seemed that his spasms always occurred right _before _Tsunade came around. She pondered for a moment about how coincidental that was before resuming her original train of thought.

In the last fifteen minutes of class, Kakashi would close his book, claim he was bored, and force the other three into teams of two for random games of "wit and skill." It was always the Byakugans—Hinata and Neji—versus the Sharingans—Kakashi and Sasuke.

Inevitably, in the last five minutes or so, Kakashi would always desert Team Sharingan and join the Byakugans to thoroughly tromp Sasuke, who would always leave class in a huff, only to return the next day still huffy. Hinata randomly wondered if he was ever not annoyed, though she finally decided the likelihood would be similar to her not being shy.

She was interrupted in her musings rather rudely by the door sliding open with a bang that caused her to leap to her feet in fright. Cringing, she watched as Kakashi stormed in, his usual cheery mood sour. Surprisingly early and terrifyingly narrow-eyed, he rammed his butt onto Sasuke's favored chair and cursed under his breath when the wood didn't give. After watching him cross and uncross his legs ten or eleven times, she finally ventured a tremulous, "G-good afternoon, Kakashi-sensei…"

His one-eyed glare had her dropping back down onto her sofa in an instant. He continued to glare before growling so softly that she wasn't quite sure she heard it, "Detention."

"Eh?" Her head shot up, eyes wide and mouth trembling with suppressed fear. She surely couldn't have heard right. Hinata had never done anything to warrant a _detention_ before. "D-d-detention, Kakashi-sensei?"

He ignored her and pulled out his dog-eared orange book. She knew something was up when after ten minutes of reading, he sighed, closed the book, and placed it beside him on the desk. No giggling, no creased, smiling eye. Something was wrong.

Just as she decided to try and say something to end the awkward awkwardness, he abruptly stood up and exited, slamming the sliding door behind him. She jumped up to the door window and watched his hunched form meandering purposelessly down the hallway.

Empathetic as she was, Hinata could not help wanting to go after him and help in whatever way she could. But just as she yanked the sliding door open, she came face to face with a smirking Tsunade. "Hm, what's this? Hasn't class started?"

Tsunade's playful smirk grew wider as she peered into the lounge and was met with emptiness. "Late again, huh? Knew I shouldn't have placed him in charge of the doujutsu class." She rolled her eyes dramatically. Or perhaps intoxicatedly, as her eyes rolled up and wouldn't roll back down again…

Hinata blinked before quickly replying, "Oh, u-um, Kakashi-sensei has…gone to, u-um, gone to…get something?"

The look on Tsunade's face told her quite clearly that she wasn't buying it. Hinata slumped miserably, wondering why she was such a bad liar. "He should be right back… Sh-should I pass along a m-message?"

Tsunade shrugged. "That's okay, I don't need to see him personally. Just wanted to see how the old man was holding up." She half-turned to leave, but stopped.

Apparently in a chatty mood, she grinned at Hinata. "You're lucky you're so young. Not having to worry about aging and wrinkles and drooping…"—Hinata wasn't quite sure what to make of _that_—"…Ahh, I remember when I was fifteen and the good times I had…"

Tsunade droned on and on, while Hinata did her best to pay attention and nod when appropriate. She wiggled her foot unobtrusively, since it had began to itch _terribly_ but stopped when Tsunade began digging into the pocket of her robes. She scribbled something on a scrap piece of paper, stuck it into a small container, and capped it neatly. "Here." She threw the bottle at Hinata, who failed spectacularly to catch it and ended up scuttling around on her hands and knees to grab it from under the table. "Give this to Kakashi. It's not every day an old man becomes older, after all. At least he'll be young in one sense…!" She cackled before exiting.

Blinking in confusion at the latter half of Tsunade's speech, she stretched her fingers as far as they would go until she could finally roll the wayward pill bottle back over to her hand and stared at the pink heart scribbled on the cap. She stood back up to her full height, turning the bottle over in her hands before dropping it in shock. Was Kakashi sick?

The pills spilled out of the bottle, landing every which way just as Neji and Sasuke finally entered the room. Instinctually avoiding the rolling bottle, Neji stooped down and swiped at the pills before almost losing his hold upon catching a glimpse. He turned on Hinata, throwing a little blue pill at her. "Hinata-sama! What is the meaning of this?"

She leaned down and pinched a pill off of the ground and said honestly, "I-I'm not sure…"

Neji scowled before looming over her. "Where did you get this?"

"From Tsunade-sama…" Was she completely missing something?

"What?" Sasuke finally decided to enter the conversation, snatching a pill from Neji's outstretched palm. "Why do you have Viagra, Hyuuga?"

.

..

...

..

.

Later, Neji recalled feeling the tiniest bit of a strange, creeping sensation that entered his gut and tore mini cyclones throughout his abdomen. He noted that it usually occurred right after his blame-it-on-others reflex kicked in. "They're Hinata-sama's," he replied tersely, willing Sasuke's face to catch on fire.

Sasuke turned slowly to Hinata, his left eyebrow rising past his hairline. "Oh?" The leer was unmistakable. The unusual feeling crept up into Neji's throat.

When Sasuke began perversely taunting the shy, white-eyed girl, Neji involuntarily cringed before the light bulb went off.

Oh. He had read about this before. Guilt, right?

He was interrupted from his musings when Hinata, in a desperate attempt to escape Sasuke's mocking, crouched down over the floor to pick up the scattered blue pills. She dusted them off as carefully as possible before placing them back into the pill bottle. Hinata blinked when she saw the slip of paper curled up into the bottle and plucked it out, uncurling it as she read, "Happy birthday, old man."

"Oh!" she cried in surprise. "Today's Kakashi-sensei's birthday!"

For some reason, instead of clearing things up, it only served to cause more confusion. If today was Kakashi's birthday, why was he acting so strange? Hinata mused a little bit before widening her eyes in realization. _Maybe Kakashi-sensei is upset that no one wished him a happy birthday?_

Hinata glanced at Neji and Sasuke. Both boys had grown quiet, unnerved by the strange play of emotion on her normally reserved face. "Uhm…" she trailed off, feeling shy all of a sudden. Though she was used to stoic, and had grown up her whole life amidst it, she still hesitated to confront it head on. It was somewhat like stepping in front of a train at the last second, at least from what she could visually imagine. "Neji-niisan. Could you, um, get some paper and streamers from the art room?" He nodded before slipping out. She turned to Sasuke. "S-S-Sasuke-kun, c-could—"

His glare cut her off easily. "Unlike him, I'm not your personal slave boy."

"Just, um, just watch the room, please?"

He rolled his eyes, which she decided to take as an unwilling yes. She bowed gratefully to him while backing out of the room and took off quickly in the direction of the main gate.

Gulping nervously, she activated her Byakugan and quickly scanned the school grounds before breaking into a run. She used a nearby tree as leverage to vault over the gate wall and jogged down the street towards the shops.

Her heart pounded with exhilaration. _I can't believe I did that… I've never ditched class before!_

Feeling somewhat badass, she entered her favorite pastry shop and stopped with trepidation. _What kind of cake did Kakashi-sensei like?_ She bit her lip, fretting. _Did he even like sweets?_ That thought seemed too preposterous to her…but then again, Sasuke seemed not to like sweets…_He's a _special _case, _she decided before purchasing a simple chocolate cake.

Smiling sweetly at the clerk, she quietly asked him if it was okay to write an inscription. Taken by surprise at the shy girl with pearly white eyes and long, navy-tinted black hair, he stammered a yes.

"Um… h-how about, 'Happy birthday, Kakashi-sensei'?"

It wasn't the most original statement, but… it's not like he would grade her on it! She stood on her tiptoes to watch as the clerk prepped a tube of frosting and began shakily spelling out the characters in hot pink. "It's the only color left," the clerk explained apologetically when he noticed her staring.

Blushing, she shook her head emphatically, afraid of offending the nice boy. "N-No, it's just so intere—"

She was suddenly whirled around and was now staring at her teacher instead of the shop boy. "K-K-Kaka-Kaka-shi…" she tried to stammer, when he cut her off.

"Detention." His voice was low and soft and full of scary promises.

Her head hung. "Y-Yes…"

Kakashi marched outside and rudely leaned against the display window, clearly waiting for her to finish her business. Hinata hurriedly turned to the boy, who had stopped writing at "Kaka" and had somehow developed a slight tremor in his hand. She glanced back at the seemingly relaxed, slouched position of her teacher and quickly handed over money for the cake. "I-I'll just take it as it is…"

Within the next minute, she joined Kakashi outside of the shop. He only said once more, "Detention," before ambling back towards the school. Hinata blinked. Wait, did that mean she had three detentions? Or was he simply being nice and reminding her that she had detention so she wouldn't forget and get into more trouble?

She sighed miserably, clutching the cake box to her chest. Eyeing Kakashi's abdomen from below her lashes, she felt even more miserable. Kakashi was only trying to teach her—here she somehow forgot that the only thing she had really learned all year in Kakashi's doujutsu class was how to piss off Sasuke, and she had kind of already known how to do that anyway—and she was such an ungrateful and hideously behaved student! Now he would have to monitor her and go home later and what if he had birthday plans for after school and she was ruining them by making him stay, and…

Hinata didn't realize she was hyperventilating until a hand covered her mouth. "Just breathe," he told her softly, slightly opening his fingers to let air in. She nodded wordlessly, heart thumping with the unfamiliar proximity of another human being. Her fingers trembled, and she tried not to concentrate on the feeling of his palm against her lips.

He removed his hand once her breathing calmed, and they continued on their way back to the school.

Inside, he led her down the hallway, taking what she thought was probably the longest possible route back to the room, which ironically was right by the entrance they came in.

Hinata perked up when she realized that Kakashi was about to walk back into the room—the decorated, pretty birthday room! She held her breath in anticipation as his fingers touched the handle. Unbeknownst to her, he heard the slight hitch in her breath and raised one silver eyebrow before rolling his eye. He slid the door open smoothly and ushered her in first, to her surprise. "Huh," he muttered, when no eraser came crashing down on her head. Surely she had been waiting for a prank of some sort? Stepping gingerly back into the room of mismatched furniture, his face froze.

There were… what looked to be streamers in bright orange and puke green, in a tangled mess on the floor, with more strands hanging unattractively off of the couches and armchairs. Sasuke was angrily picking puke green strands off of his person while Neji was nonchalantly unwinding himself from the orange roll. Hinata blinked in dismay before sighing. She _knew_ she should not have left the decorating to Neji-niisan! He obviously had never used paper streamers before…

Belatedly, she turned back to her teacher and chirped, "H-Happy birthday, Kakashi-sensei!"

His face was still frozen into a strange expression that looked to be one fourth surprise, one third puzzlement, and the remaining portion seemed to be his struggle to keep calm. Hinata smiled softly. Was he going to cry? She felt slightly embarrassed, yet strangely pleased at the thought. Maybe afterwards, they could all talk about how happy birthdays should be, and…

"Detention!"

Eyes wide, she looked back at her teacher who was now grimacing and pointing his finger at her. Oh. What she had thought was a struggle to keep from crying was apparently a struggle to keep from wringing her neck.

Not knowing why and how, she gasped, "Um, I-I already have detention, K-K-Kakashi-sensei…"

"Detention," he growled.

"D-D-Deten—"

"DETENTION."

She stopped. Apparently speaking was making him angrier.

"Don't be late," he said coldly, and somewhat hypocritically, before slipping past her and disappearing.

"S-sorry," she whispered, confused and upset.

The day's events finally took their toll on the quiet girl. Her shoulders heaved as she gasped back sobs, tears winding twin trails down her cheeks. She attempted to cover her eyes with her hands, dropping the cake box on the floor. Neji and Sasuke looked at each other uncomfortably, before simultaneously trying to defuse the situation.

"Hinata-sama? Are you ok?"

"Lovers' spat?"

Neji was immediately at Sasuke's throat, growling. Sasuke tightened his own hands around Neji's wrists, gripping painfully. The two boys stood at an impasse before exchanging impressive blows. Hinata was forcibly brought out of her misery when the fight entered her vicinity. Caught by an arm and flipped neatly by Neji, Sasuke managed to avoid landing flat on his face. Instead, his foot went straight through the cake box.

The struggle halted as soon as it had begun. Sasuke awkwardly removed his foot.

Hands still pressed to her teary eyes, Hinata immediately stopped crying. She had heard the distinctive squelch of shoe hitting cake. She pictured the cake: dark, rich chocolate-y frosting and the semi-sweet, melt-in-your-mouth lusciousness that lay beneath a painted surface. She imagined Sasuke's shoe, covered in dirt, grime, hallway muck, and most likely animal feces, breaking the impressively frosted surface and destroying the artfully created decadence. The camel's back broke.

In her single, most-impressive move ever, Hinata threw the boys out by their ears in one fell swoop. The door slammed off its frame and rebounded an inch or two as the two boys stood in muted shock. Staring at each other, they mutually and silently decided to never speak of the matter again and headed off to await their next class, each pondering on the frightening emotional link between girls and chocolate.

Inside the classroom, Hinata gently gathered the cake box and placed it on the desk. Lifting the lid, she gasped sympathetically for her dear… friend.

Although a hunk of the top and some of the pretty writing had been stomped, the majority of the cake was still intact. She frowned, reading the new message: "Hapday, Kaka".

Deciding to not risk yet another detention for another potentially obscure mistake, Hinata took the box with her as she trudged down the hallway towards her next class. She was so caught up in her moment of doom and gloom that she didn't realize she had stopped by the ninjutsu department's office semi-consciously upon hearing "Kakashi."

Curiosity piqued, she stood still, keeping out of sight from the slightly open doorway. Feeling guilty for eavesdropping, Hinata was even more overcome by the desire to know why Kakashi so hated his birthday when he typically had no strong feelings for anything—except for his educational novels, which he seemed to love dearly. She held her breath and inwardly promised to be a better person… later.

"…already thirty…must feel like he's getting old…"

"…over the hill…"

She held her breath, moved closer, and strained to hear.

"Even men fear the big 3-0, huh, Kurenai-san?"

"I'm dreading my thirtieth birthday, and I still have another three years!" laughed a familiar, richly feminine voice.

"Apparently even the Great Copy Nin is not immune to the fear of aging."

"He's only human," snorted Anko. "A bitchy, whiny human, at that. What's age but a number? Thirty-year-old men are just as good at fu—"

Hinata had her moment of realization, and not a moment too soon. She immediately turned tail and headed back in the abandoned classroom. She emerged five minutes later, the determination shining in her white eyes.

.

..

...

..

.

As the last bell sounded for the day, Kakashi realized with a start that momentarily broke his dejected gloom that he had left _Icha Icha Tactics_ in the doujutsu classroom. He sat up and sprinted down the hallway, fearing the fate of his beloved book should a student of his find it innocently lying out in the open. He slid the door open and was immediately at the desk. His hands darted toward the orange covered book and he quickly leafed through the pages, relieved to find them unmarked.

He noticed belatedly the white box sitting on the same desk. Its corners were smashed from lid to bottom, forming strange contours, and he could just make out the beginning of a standard-issue, sandal-clad footprint.

_Hinata had been carrying this earlier,_ he remembered, _and probably got it from that bakery._

His depression abated for the moment, he lifted the lid and peeked inside, finding a small note taped to the underside of the lid.

_Kakashi-sensei,_

_Did you know that the average number of years a man lives is 76?_

She had obviously _not_ done her research from The Big Book of Shinobi Statistics_._

_If so, then you have not even lived half of your expected life! So even though I am only a student, please take heart in knowing that you still have years ahead of you. I am sorry for upsetting you, so please enjoy the rest of your birthday! It's not much, but try some of this cake._

_Hyuuga Hinata_

Although he would ordinarily find great annoyance in the naivete of useless optimism since the majority of shinobi didn't even live to see a thirtieth birthday, he couldn't help but smile.

It had been easy to take out his depression and anger on her, but now he couldn't help feeling a bit guilty. He hadn't really meant to be such a bastard, but the way she had smiled as if he _enjoyed _reaching thirty years of age had just struck a sensitive chord in him he wasn't aware he had. After all, aging only meant becoming slower, being more tired, making possibly fatal mistakes, and sprinting ever so closer to death. She didn't understand; she was still an academy student, studying the theoretical art of the shinobi and undertaking simple, easy missions, never putting her life on the line or making life-or-death decisions that split friendships and families as he had at the same age.

But, he supposed he could allow her that stupid way of thinking. The time when the blinders would come off was close approaching, and remembering his own innocence, regardless of how short the time was, he wasn't willing to begrudge her that one small favor.

Kakashi was then interrupted on his musings by a long, sad wail from his stomach. Staring at the cake and inhaling the insanely aromatic chocolate, he couldn't resist.

He dug in, managing two wild mouthfuls before the door dramatically slid open.

.

..

...

..

.

Hinata closed the door behind her, heart thudding wildly. Managing to catch her breath, not even realizing she had stopped breathing, she squeezed her eyes shut, trying to remove images of Kakashi-sensei with cake crumbs dotting his mouth, and the almost _cute,_ bewildered deer-in-the-headlights look she had seen for a second before his guard came back up.

She drew another shaky breath, and choked as giggles burst up from somewhere deep within her. Shaking helplessly, tears streaming down her face, she laughed freely, allowing her burdens to fall to the wayside.

It was a long while, ten or even fifteen minutes before she could control her giggles and straighten. She turned to look at the door behind her, wondering if Kakashi had heard her mad fit of laughter.

Somewhat surprised that she didn't feel guilty for essentially laughing at him, something strange overtook Hinata. Before she could think much upon it, she opened the door again, catching Kakashi again in the act of messily scarfing chocolate cake. He didn't seem to care this time, probably aware that she would re-enter. In a simplistic peace-offering, he offered her a chunk. "Cake?"

She smiled and made her way towards him. Taking the chunk from his chocolate-coated fingers, she popped it into her mouth and delighted in the sudden total body shiver that erupted down her spine from the sugar overload. Realizing that his offer was more along the lines of an apology, she hesitated, then quickly leaned over and gave him a dry peck on the cheek.

It was inappropriate, strange, and tasted of chocolate, but somehow it seemed _right._ Whereas before she had no understanding and could only stammer and wreck the situation due to her ignorance, now she had enough confidence to look at him through her eyelashes and offer again, quietly, "Happy birthday, sensei."

He offered her a genuine smile, one free of cloth and confinement. "Thanks, Hinata-chan."

She giggled softly when his hand automatically reached up to tousle her hair before stopping upon realization that it was covered in chocolate. Instead, he poked her in the nose, leaving a brown smudge and provoking a squeak.

Hinata lifted her head to look at him shyly, marveling at how the same jaw line concealed by cloth seemed so vastly different when exposed, regardless of the low lighting and chocolate smears. Catching her eyes, he smiled pleasantly. "By the way, you still have detention."

Although her mood sunk somewhat, she nodded, remembering she had racked up not one, but _six _detentions. She moved to seat herself at a nearby desk; he stretched out one long leg and abruptly halted her. She gazed at him curiously.

Kakashi cleared his throat. "Your punishment—and you _will_ accept it—is to… join me." He patted the space next to him.

And so, Hyuuga Hinata—soft-spoken, well-mannered, horrible public speaker, and terribly shy good student—spent the afternoon stuffing cake down her throat with her detention-giver.

_fin_

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Submission for the September 2009 DateMe prompt "Teacher's Pet" featuring Kakashi and Hinata. Two of my favorite characters but not necessarily a favored pairing. Eh, I had fun regardless.

Happy birthday, Kakashi! (And me!)

A little background on the universe: Obviously alternate from pre-story onwards. Instead of graduating as genin and becoming a three-man cell that accepts missions full-time, the kids have to go through academy up through high school but can still sign up for missions as three-man cells, but not necessarily always in the same formations. Think of it as part-time jobs. I might be using this universe in a future story… we'll see?

Thanks to the unknown, but much loved reviewer who pointed out I left a large, Viagra-filled plot hole in the story! (Which is now resolved, two years later, in the omake below.)

As always, feel free to leave any comments, critiques, or questions below!

* * *

"Oh!"

Hinata sat up abruptly and winced with regret at the movement, favoring her right hip. She got up from her previously prone position on the floor, alternated licking and wiping off the chocolate frosting on her right hand, dug it into her jacket pocket, and produced a capsule that rattled. She limped behind the teacher's desk and crouched down by a silver head streaked with chocolate, hissing as her knees wobbled. Kakashi barely roused from the exclamation, instead letting out a grouchy groan. She poked his side and watched as he opened his eye, murmuring, "Hmmmm?"

She took a second to flip a chocolate-coated clump of hair behind her shoulder, fervently regretting participating in a food fight against _Sharingan Kakashi_, of all people.

"Here, Sensei."

Kakashi did little more than turn his head to look at her, so she located his hand, still covered in chocolate cake crumbs, and gently placed the pill bottle in his palm.

She fought a yawn and climbed onto the desk for a nap, letting her wounds and energy depletion lull her to sleep.

Clenching the bottle in one hand, Kakashi grunted and sat up, wincing as bright lights flashed across his vision. Damn. Lee might be able to kick everyone's asses after a sip of alcohol but Hinata seemed to operate under consumption of chocolate. She very nearly came somewhat close to almost tearing him a new one.

He regarded the bottle wearily before popping the lid off. Kakashi shook a few pills onto his palm and stared.

Quickly, his eyes flickered up to the girl lying prone on her back on the desk above him, her chest rapidly rising and falling with… god, expectation?

_Oh shit._

* * *

_el fin. for realz._


End file.
